My Boss's Kiss Read online

  I rub a hand over my face. Scrub it. How can I say no to her? … I can’t say no to her. But I don’t want her at our practices everyday. I won’t even be able to practice. I’ll end up staring. Or dying. Because when she’s around I forget to breathe.

  I clear my throat. “Sure. I guess. She can play the tambourine or something.”

  I know that sounds lame. But the tambourine—that’s harmless. It could let her feel like she’s part of the band, but she won’t have to come to all of our practices. Hardly any of them. But she can go up on stage with us. Be part of us—sort of … yet not.

  “The tambourine?” Jason scoffs at the idea, giving me a look like, Dude, come on. Are you kidding me?

  Then he rocks my world, just like he was planning. His smile grows before he says it, then he laughs. “She wants to play the guitar.”

  I raise my eyebrows at him, like are you kidding me? Because I know Ashley. Too well. She plays the piano—kicks butt at it. And like I said, she sings soft and pretty to songs. I could listen to her all day. Would kill to. But she doesn’t play the guitar. That’s my saving grace—Ashley. Doesn’t. Play. The. Guitar. But looking at Jason, a tremor creeps down my spine. Suddenly I know. The knowledge bleeds through my soul. Smacks me in the face. Jason’s been teaching her to play. Secretly. The dude tells me everything about her, can’t shut up about her … but he never told me this.

  “She’s good, dude.” Jason hands Ashley his guitar, looking proud. “Play. Show him.”

  Ashley takes the guitar and holds it like she knows what she’s doing. And already—just from that—I can tell I’m in trouble.

  I stare up at the ceiling, exhaling slowly.

  She plays the solo to the song, One. It’s so hot. I squeeze my eyes shut. Maaan! As though I wasn’t a goner already. This is going to kill me—Ashley now playing the guitar.

  When she’s done, I rub the back of my neck, silently groaning. Oh. Man.

  I can feel everyone’s eyes on me. They’re silent, but staring. Waiting for me to answer. Decide if she’s good enough to be in the band. Which she is.

  Finally, I look back at them. Well, not really. I look at Jason. Only Jason. That’s all I can manage. “Fine. Whatever.”

  That’s all I say, then head for the door, shoving my hands deep in my pockets because they’re sweating buckets.

  Jason and Zack both protest my sudden bailing, asking where I’m going.

  Outside. So I can breathe. That’s where I’m going. But I don’t tell them that—of course.

  “Look, I was here on time,” I tell Jason, like I’m mad or something. “It’s not my fault you’re late. I’ve got to bounce.”

  Three sets of eyes stare at me like I’m nuts, so I go on with a bogus explanation, though it’s a total lie and they all probably know it. “I have things I have to do—to get ready. Remember that dorky ‘computer companion’ thing from school is tonight.”

  “Oh yeah,” Jason says, like he forgot. And he probably did, because who he gets or doesn’t get as a “companion” doesn’t keep him up nights wondering. He couldn’t care less. ‘Cause his “real” companion is Ashley. Who cares who the school computer pairs him up with? I totally get that. I do.

  Totally.

  I wince. “Look, I’ve got to go.”

  “But she can play?”

  I hear Jason’s words and freeze at the door. He’s talking about Ashley—about letting her be in the band.

  I draw in a breath. “Sure. Whatever.”

  Finally, I turn to face them—because I feel like I have to. But I can’t really look at them. Any of them. I stare down at the ground. “But … I may not.”

  “What?!” Jason asks.

  “I’ve been thinking about quitting.” I rub the back of my neck, still not able to look at him—or her. I just stare at Zack’s drum-set as though it’s fascinating and I’m thinking about making off with it. I can feel everyone’s eyes on me though. And I know exactly how they look—their eyes, I mean. They’re full of question marks and disappointment.

  Ashley wants to do things with “us.” Jason and me. So she can spend more time with Jason. But that’s not going to happen—the “us” stuff. I can’t take it. It makes me feel like a creep and gives me an aching in the pit of my stomach where I seriously need to double over from the pain.

  I flit a look to Jason, but can’t really meet his gaze, since I’m going to feed him a lie. It bites. “I’ve been meaning to tell you … I’m not really feeling it anymore. I need a break.”

  Jason shakes his head, looking disgusted. “Dude, what’s with you?”

  “Nothing.” I feel like a wad letting him down. Jason is my boy. My bud. Which is why I’m going to stay away from irresistible Ashley. Why I’m going to let her play the guitar in my band. I’m the problem—not them.

  “I need to go,” I say over my shoulder as I head out the door.

  Only a few moments later Ashley comes chasing after me.

  “Adam,” she calls, and I freeze. The sound of her voice saying my name sends my heart slamming against my chest.

  Suddenly I’m in a cold sweat.

  Even when she catches up to me, I don’t turn around and face her.

  “I’m sorry,” she says and her voice is full of agony. It makes me glare up at the sky. Why do I have to like her so much? Why?

  Why when I came back to school at the beginning of the year was my best friend “dating” the “new girl”—the one that showed up while I was away with my mom?—Ashley Knight—the prettiest girl I ever laid eyes on? It was like the world was playing a cruel, twisted joke. And it would never stop. Ever.

  Ashley’s voice was soft. “Adam, I didn’t mean to make more problems. I just wanted—”

  I scrub a hand over my face, interrupting. “I know what you wanted.”

  She draws in a breath. “Well, I don’t have to be in the band. It was just a thought—what I wanted. But it’s your band—yours and Jason’s. I don’t need to be in it.”

  I squeeze my eyes shut, then turn around to face her. Her beautiful green eyes look anxious—I make her anxious. “Look Ashley, you can do whatever you want. I need to go.”

  Her lips part slightly. Then she nods. “For the school’s companion thing?”

  She says it kind of sympathetic-like. Like she feels sorry for me, and like she hopes I can find some sort of love and companionship—even in my “condition.” You know, me being a jerk and everything.

  Or maybe she’s just hopeful that I’ll find someone other than Fiona.

  Or who knows, maybe she’s just hoping I’ll find someone so I won’t spend so much time with Jason.

  Who knows what’s going on in her head? Not me. All I can do is look into her eyes and get lost.

  So, I look away.

  “Yeah, the companion-thing,” I tell her.

  Then I add, just because I’m a tool, “I mean, in case me and Fiona don’t work out, but don’t hold your breath. Fiona sent me a text this afternoon—well, a picture. Of her. And not much else—I mean clothing-wise.”

  Okay, talk about TMI. Why won’t I shut up? I mean, usually people have to pull my teeth to get me to talk. Especially Ashley. So why am I telling her this?

  Ashley whispers, “I hope you find someone nice at the companion thing.”

  I wince.

  Then I tell her with a fake grin and wink, “Nice isn’t really what I’m looking for.”

  She sighs, “Then I guess Fiona’s perfect for you.”

  I breathe out a laugh, “Touché.”

  She has a leaf in her hair. I’m dying to brush it out. Use it as an excuse to touch her hair—to gently get the leaf for her.

  Instead I snap a picture of it with my phone. Though she thinks I’m just being rude and texting while she’s standing here trying to talk to me.

  She sighs. “Well, bye,” she says, and starts to walk away, but then she turns back to me. “Good luck with the companion thing.”

  “Yeah, you to,”
I tell her. I mean, it’s mandatory. She’s got to do it too. And I’m pretty sure she’s not going to be matched up with Jason. As much as she’s hoping she will; still, I don’t think it’s going to happen.

  Once she rounds the corner, I send her the picture of the leaf in her hair.

  CHAPTER 12

  Ashley

  Ashley

  After making Adam quit his own band, I went home feeling sick. Really sick. I was all sweaty and trembling. Adam always makes me feel that way.

  Anxious and confused—those are the feelings Adam stirs in me. Always. Continually. And he seems to do it on purpose. He hates me. Though, I guess I get why. Sort of. He’s been Jason’s best friend forever. Then I moved in and wham! Now Adam has to share Jason with me.

  I actually know how that feels. The exact same thing happened to me a long time ago. I had a best friend, then a popular girl moved in next door to her and I became the outsider. The third wheel. So, I understood how Adam was feeling. But I tried so hard to include Adam in things, yet he seemed to resent me even more for it.

  I didn’t get it. Why wouldn’t he give me a chance?

  … well, okay, actually I even got that. When that new girl moved in and swooped my best friend away, I hated that girl. (Her name was Heather by the way.) Suddenly, it felt like I was an outsider. Like Heather was the best friend instead of me. They lived right next door to each other, so it was easy for them to hangout constantly and suddenly it seemed they did everything together. Everything. I felt left out. Though they tried to include me, I was jealous of Heather. And heartbroken.

  But so, I understand how Adam feels. To Adam, I’m Heather.

  Unfortunately, I somewhat despised Heather … right up until I moved away. So, I don’t hold out much hope for Adam ever accepting me. That makes me really sad though. I like Adam. So much. He actually seems really nice … well, to everyone but me.

  I sulk around my house, not wanting to do anything. I just sweat over my piano, in between pacing. But then I remember—I have this “thing” for school. I’d signed up for this “social experiment.” Almost everyone did, because we each got $5 to use toward the “experiment.” And it was a “social” thing—like free $5 to hang out with a friend. Well, that’s how the school’s guidance counselors had explained it.

  For the experiment, we’d had to answer a bunch of random questions, then the computer was supposed to hook us up with our “perfect match.” Not a date. The counselors kept stressing that. Most likely we would end up getting matched up with someone that would make a great “friend.” So, I was thinking I’d probably end up with Summer or one of my other friends.

  Jason had wanted to cheat and copy down my answers so we could be paired together. But I didn’t want to do that. “Aren’t you curious?” I’d asked him with a teasing smile. “Don’t you want to see who in this whole school is most suited to you?”

  It was funny—hilarious actually. But it made Jason groan because my words were the exact ones the counselors kept using to sell us on the idea and get everyone to volunteer. “You may end up finding your perfect match,” they said over and over, then they’d always stress, “Match as in friend. Your perfect companion/friend—not a date.”

  Well, the computer had selected for me to meet my “companion” at the ice cream shop near our school.

  When I got there, I was early since I was sort of excited. Who would my “perfect companion” be? Instead of ordering my ice cream, I sat at an empty table near the door and texted Jason. He was supposed to meet his “companion” at the skate park.

  “Who is your perfect match?” I texted.

  “Max.”

  I laughed reading that.

  Jason texted more: “We’re going to take the money and go to the movies instead, though. The computer should have known—we both want to see Zombie Slasher.”

  “You two really are a perfect match.”

  “Ha, ha.”

  I quickly texted: “But really, the computer chose activities that require interaction—you aren’t supposed to interact during movies. It’s frowned on.”

  “Yeah, yeah. Who did you get?”

  Good question.

  I looked up and then—Oh. My. Gosh. My heart slammed against my chest. ‘Cause I found Adam (!!) staring at me through the glass door. Adam!!

  Whoa!

  His face was ashen, like he was looking at a ghost—like he was being haunted (by me).

  I sucked in my breath as tremors shot through my body. Poor guy, I thought sympathetically, even as my insides were totally spazzing out. He just can’t get rid of me. As much as he tries.

  We stared at each other a long time. So long, the tremors in my body started to change a little—get tingly. And warm. Which was weird. Totally confusing—and unsettling. Because this was Adam. And he hated me.

  Despised me.

  The guy practically winced every time I spoke. Seriously. Winced.

  So, the way I was suddenly feeling—it was crazy … especially because he was my boyfriend’s BEST FRIEND!!!

  CHAPTER 13

  ADAM

  ADAM

  Yeah, I knew there was the possibility that I’d end up with Ashley. I’d half-expected it. Half-wanted it and half-dreaded it. I didn’t “cheat” to get her though. I just knew what she liked … and I liked that stuff too. So, I put it down.

  Jason could have done the same thing. But for some reason, he didn’t. I mean, he didn’t “know” Ashley. Not really. He dragged her to the movies he wanted to see. He was clueless what she wanted. Didn’t even really think about it. But I did. I listened. And I remembered. Every word she said. About everything. It would go straight to my heart, whether I wanted it to or not. It would go there and stay. Forever.

  So, yeah. There was Ashley … my perfect match. Seeing her through the window, my heart exploded. And I froze. Couldn’t move. Just stared at her, in a cold sweat.

  This wasn’t supposed to happen.

  I thought I’d made it so it wouldn’t. I’d tried. Yet there she was … my best friend’s girlfriend.

  I stared at her a long time. Watched her texting—probably Jason. No, definitely Jason. I knew because she had that glow she gets whenever she talks to him.

  It made me feel like a creep—watching her … yet I couldn’t move. Couldn’t walk away. I wanted to.

  … but I couldn’t.

  Finally, she looked up and our eyes met—actually, locked on each other’s. Her soft, pink lips parted slightly. My heart froze in my chest, then went spastic and ricocheted off my ribcage.

  I could tell she was shocked. Yet she just stared.

  Her pretty green eyes so focused on mine knocked the air out of me. I swear, I couldn’t breathe. Or move. I just stood there staring into her gorgeous gazing eyes.

  She tilted her head slightly, like a question. Like, how did this happen? How in the world did we get each other?

  But she also seemed to be asking if I was going to come in and sit with her … or bolt like usual? Good question. I wasn’t sure. Part of me wanted to pounce in there like a puppy dog and gobble up her attention while Jason wasn’t around to take it. But the other part of me knew I was being a creep. Knew I should just walk away.

  Staring at her, I tried to get my lungs to work. Breathe in air … let it out. That’s all I could focus on. Yet, while I was busy doing that—reminding myself how to breathe—I decided I’d go in … then bolt. I’d tell her I couldn’t stay. I’d leave.

  It seemed lame. And kind of mean—ruining her whole night by wasting her time coming here. But what else could I do? Drool over my best friend’s girlfriend all night?

  I squeezed my eyes shut. I took a deep breath, then trailed into the ice cream shop and slowly took the seat beside Ashley.

  She smiled at me, her eyes full of wonder—like how could this be? How did we get paired together? She didn’t know, of course, that we had so much in common—music and bands and writing. Also, she didn’t know how I’d filled out
the questionnaire. First, I’d filled it with the truth—things I knew both of us liked. And stuff like ‘I could listen to the piano all night’—because I could. And I did. I’d been over at Jason’s once while Ashley was there practicing for a piano recital. Heard her practice the same songs over and over. Jason had begged her to stop, but I’d wanted to beg her to keep going.

  Instead, I’d convinced Jason to go outside with me to shoot hoops while Ashley practiced. Finally he did. But while we played basketball in his driveway, I could still hear Ashley playing the piano through her open window. It kind of messed up my game, but man, it was worth it. She was good. So good. I could have listened to her all night.

  After filling out the questionnaire—and adding all that stuff about liking the piano— I’d slumped down in my chair knowing it was totally possible I’d get Ashley for a partner. And knowing I couldn’t be her partner. Knowing as much as I wanted to, I would never go through with it. I couldn’t.

  So, I’d quickly written that I didn’t only love the piano and music—I loved my guitar. That I lived for it. See, I thought that would keep us from being partners—me so into my guitar. ‘Cause I didn’t have a clue back then … that Ashley was into guitars as well. I thought I was safe.

  “Adam.” Ashley spoke my name softly as I sat down beside her.

  My eyes closed at the sound, ‘cause it sent a jet of warmth through me.

  I cleared my throat, knowing I had to do this fast—before I caved. I wiped my sweating hands on my jeans. “I have two tickets for tonight to see the band—Roll.”

  Ashley’s eyes lit up. I get a strange thrill in my stomach whenever she does that—when she gets excited. It makes sparks rush through me.

  Hearing about the band, she turned all bubbly, smiling huge. “I love them!” she gushed.

  Yeah, I know. But that’s not what I said. I said, “Yeah? Well, you can use the tickets then. You and Jason.” I reached for my phone. “I’ll text him.”